Today was my second to last TMS treatment. And I don’t want to sound dramatic, but TMS has changed my life. What is TMS, you might be asking? Well. TMS stands for Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation. It is a treatment for depression in which they stimulate the mood regulation areas of the brain with magnetic pulses. […]
lowlights
Well life has been a roller coaster lately with the last week or so in a pretty low dip if we’re being perfectly honest. Most people didn’t know it, but I was in pretty rough shape. I’m starting to come out the other side, though. And at least now we have some answers. I’ve been […]
linger
Well I did it. I asked for a vacation. A last minute vacation, at that. It was either “Give me 2 days of vacation” or “See ya in a month after a stint in the hospital.” Yeah, it was that bad. Last week was full of despair. Like deep despair. If you’d asked me why […]
Been There, Done That
Well I just sent an email that I figured wouldn’t send but I was hopeful but it didn’t and I’m a little bit bummed. My posts don’t seem to bounce, so I figured I’d turn to the blog for some reflection. I have some old readers and some new ones. You old-timers might want to […]
When Recovery Gets Boring
“I’m bored.” That’s what I told my therapist. “What’s boring?” she replied. “Recovery. Recovery is boring.” And it’s true. When I was in the throws of my illness, I was enveloped with insanity. My mind was a battleground. And there’s nothing boring about a war zone. There’s always something going on. A bullet to dodge, […]
An Open Letter to My Psychiatrist
Dear Psychiatrist, It was an ordinary appointment. Nothing special at all. Until the end. When you said you had something to tell me. Then I got scared. Not because I didn’t know what was coming, but because I did. I knew what you were going to say before you said it. “I’ve been given a […]